...when you don't comment my posts i seem to lose enthusiasm, but i'll try to force myself to write about each one of my days, so that i could easily remember that emotions and feelings later^^
I've checked right now, and it seems i didn't yet mention our yesterday's trip to greenlake. it was fun and a little bit tiring, but i really enjoyed it. we've went as a team, and we've made a circle around the lake itself, about an hour it took, and then went back home. and on our way home aktan and tair went to buy beer, yes, i help get it inside the house through the back door, yes, like a smuggler, but then i left. i actually wanted to chage my wear and come back, but i fell asleep, the moment my pajama was on me… so, i passed it out))
today i woke up pretty late, about 7 a.m. local, but got to the bathroom first - water was cold an both hot and cold sides. then i wanted to skype mom, but they broke the computer (as mom said later, during our phone call. it was because mom asked dad to download her an e-book, so that she could read in the plane on their way to israel (yes, btw, they must've departed today at 5 a.m., as i understood) but with that book a tremendous and dangerous virus downloaded to my computer (both me and mom were almost heavenly happy, that it was not our fault, 'cause otherwise dad would've killed us) and they couldn't turn pc on and get into the skype) so our dialoge was rather short in our strive to spend less money on mom's phone.
then we went to campbell company again, but today we had an interview (on alex's request actually, i wonder, who pulled her tongue, when she was asking it) with the financial department lady, and it was so tense and strained and we (i actually) didn't have any questions, so there were awkward silence moments, and i think she might've got an opinion of me being not very smart, 'cause i was just sitting and listening (and also she caught me drawing, but i tried to put some scientif sense into it, to make myself look a bit better), but i've made notes from time to time, yeah… than kurt came to take us over, and i was sooo happy to see him, ah, i thought of him as of a lifebuoy. he took us to the same conference room, we've been to yesterday, and, after answering some of alex's questions, explained us his monthly charts, which described how well the company is living up to the expectations (the whole thing is on a monthly basis) and, somewhy, i've almost dropped out of the whole conversation (my eyes were closing, i didn't hear the separate words in his speech, even my head almost dropped) and tried to keep at least not completely bored look, but my constant yawning didn't do any good for my attempts.
then we went to ace english classes (we ate mcdonald's on the bus stop of our bus transfer) and didn't miss the bus, but we were still too late (about 20 minutes, just like yesterday) and had a difficult time finding our teammates. but we've sat on the lawn for the first hour, and went to some bazar thing on the second, so it wasn't entirely bad… actually, i start to think whenever there's not only alex as my company, i'm ready to go anywhere. so we had two transfers on our way home, but it was worth it. when we came home, i had some rest before dinner, and after dinner i went to the basement floor, where boys live (i was not anyhow interested in boys, though, 'cause they both were upstairs, so you can't even think of this option as possible)))) to play billiards. and after a couple of games aktan joined me and, yes, surely he bet me. than he invited me to play table tennis, and it was so much fun, really! i've pretended to be, like, not knowing hoe to play, but having played before. so it was like teaching me for him, i guess he enjoyed it, and we were playing and laughing and, like, yelling at each hit, and we were doing all of it pretty loud, so tair came out of boys' room with a camera and filmed it… i hope the mass won't see it, 'cause it's gonna ruin my whole reputation i've wasted so much time to build… but i liked it, i really enjoy it all and always in here. i guess, i'll miss them all later, 'cause now we live like a family, and then we won't even see each other, so it kind of dissapoints me.
also, i've got a thing for you to think about, when you'll be back to civilization and find some internet to read this post. i don't know, how much i'm supposed to tell you, but you are my only best friend ever, and i think some of unsaid things can become said now. the problem is, i noticed today, that the upper powers are willing to teach me a lesson, but i so stubbornly refuse to learn it. the events come in circle, and i think they will be untill i see what is the lesson here and what a i supposed to learn. the events are me, befriending two boys at a time, and i sort of like them both a bit inside, and try to show it the less outside (so that only he could see and understand it, but nobody else would notice a thing, 'cause i actually don't want to build relationships, but just to generate other party's interest in my humble self). it happened so since schooltime, from yunes and rasul, continued on (maybe i'm missing some steps here) nikita and lesha, then went on to uali and waru and now come tair and aktan. in all previous times, when i got the interest i needed (and usually it called on several following steps), i pushed the brakes hardly and started avoiding the interested one. the second one fell apart by himself usually, so i got lonely to some extent. i didn't hate it, or anything, and i guess could've stayed alone for some longer time, but then the circle repeats again. it's like some itachi used izanami on me, and i'm going in circles, up till when i'll find where my mistake is. i think, i got weaker every circle, so that now i even allowed myself to ask for help (which is supposed to be absolutely unacceptable!) and by asking for help, i expect you to give it to me. i'm even ready to wait - now i'm just on the most interesting stage, the one where i fight for attention and try to conquer boys. well, not both of them, but the one who is getting more and more ready to be conquered (which is aktan at the moment, tair doesn't seem to have any interest in my huble majesty). so, if only it doesn't get out of my control, i still have plenty of time…
will be hoping for you to find wi-fi somewhere, try neighbouring dachas, maybe it's not such an ass, as it seems to be… miss u a bit, bro… hope you won't ignore me…